Today The Unsung Mum and her friends MouseMoo&MeToo and And Another Ten Things (Sam and Suzanne in real life) are off to the Big Smoke for a laugh and drink, under the disguise of going to #Blogfest16.
The Unsung Mum is very excited about the prospect of a whole night and day away, but a trip without The Spratts brings its own kind of pressures.
It’s like you have to squash all the adulting you can possibly do in those very precious twenty-four hours. These very intelligent and world-wise women (ahem) planned to get a year’s worth of drink, sleep and cake down their necks without anyone humming the bloody Peppa Pig theme tune or fighting over the use of their mobile phones.
In between the yelling, sobbing and the frantic Googling ‘are my children bloody normal’, The Unsung Mum has spent much of the six weeks’ holiday trying to be cool and fun.
So when The Unsung Mum was offered her first PR review, for Oxygen Free Jumping no less, she felt smugly clever and accepted with swag.
Having just lived through the longest summer holiday of her life, sustained only by the tiniest hope that September would eventually come, The Unsung Mum grabbed the opportunity to tire her feral kids out with two hands, and feet, if she could have managed it.
Entering into this wondrous new world of hot teenage referees telling your children off for you while still looking like something out of GQ magazine has amazed her.
She thought places like this were a myth, somewhere between kids sleeping through the night at six weeks old and not running off in M&S. Yes, today The Unsung Mum discovered what she could only call a bloody miracle.
The Unsung Mum weeps with joy as she surveys the plush blue seats and delicious looking cake that is sweetly singing her name.