Today The Unsung Mum and her friends MouseMoo&MeToo and And Another Ten Things (Sam and Suzanne in real life) are off to the Big Smoke for a laugh and drink, under the disguise of going to #Blogfest16.
The Unsung Mum is very excited about the prospect of a whole night and day away, but a trip without The Spratts brings its own kind of pressures.
It’s like you have to squash all the adulting you can possibly do in those very precious twenty-four hours. These very intelligent and world-wise women (ahem) planned to get a year’s worth of drink, sleep and cake down their necks without anyone humming the bloody Peppa Pig theme tune or fighting over the use of their mobile phones.
The preparations for this Holy day starts well in advance. Matching socks must be found, hole free pyjamas washed and her new branded t-shirt ironed.
That’s the problem with no longer having gainful employment and which The Unsung Mum now blames for her lack of wardrobe options.
No matter, as luckily for her, Garment Printing were at hand. The Unsung Mum is slightly ashamed of her old sweaty t-shirts and rusk stained vests, so they offered her her very own double sided t-shirt for review.
On arrival at the conference, panic ensues. MUST HAVE A GREAT TIME!! What to we do first? Sniff out the free cocktails? Hunt down the hundreds of bloggers she wants to see? Or skip it all completely and laze around in the bath all day child free? Come on, there are only 24 hours!
After a rather joyful time listening to many a high-powered woman, The Unsung Mum gets to the bit she has been looking forward to the most.
The Unsung Mum is avaricious and tends to get over excited when faced with a full carb menu and free cake. It’s like she takes on a few personality of her own, pushing everyone out the way while screaming “MINE” at the top of her lungs like a three-year-old on a sugar high.
Luckily, most of the other bloggers were far more sophisticated. They gracefully introduced themselves, gave air kisses and asked about her pride an’ joy, her new t-shirt.
Parading up and down the room, The Unsung Mum explained that she got her cool new t-shirt from Garment Printing. Yes, the system was easy to use. Yes, it came quick and yes it was all pretty much self-explanatory.
She even gave them an extra twirl round to show the writing on the back. She felt flash!
Until she stupidly gulped down that fourth cocktail, and convinced her friends that tramping around London for pizza was actually a stand-up idea.
The next morning, The Unsung Mum should obviously be sighing that it has all been fun, but that she misses her Spratt’s terribly and longs to get home to them, and although she has had a great time, she wouldn’t change a thing about her life. Really, The Unsung Mum shuts herself in the bus stations bathroom, refuses to come out weeping “Just a little longer, please. Don’t make me go back.” while her much-loved friend tries to coax her out with the promise of more cake and one last drink, if she will just come out.
The Hub is at home guarding the amazing Grandma against her mean and all eating Grandchildren. The Unsung Mum misses Grandma a lot.
Disclosure: I received my cool t-shirt in return for this review post. All views and opinions expressed are my own.