Mummy Pig doesn’t get out much now she has kids, but when she does, she gets shitfaced.
She forgets everything, including her long day with her two little darling’s tomorrow.
Poor Mummy Pig.
At 430am Mummy Pig remembers she DOES have children when she stupidly tip toes up the stairs and forgets to jump the squeaky fourth step.
Silly Mummy Pig.
Now Peppa is awake, she wants to know the answers to all the important questions in life, like, why does everyone live on a hill? Why are some animals still, just animals? Why isn’t George’s name alliterated? What happens if Miss Rabbit has kids? Would she be Mummy Rabbit too?
Normally, on a Sunday, Daddy Pig is in charge, but today, he’s off to work over time. It could have something to do with Mummy Pig calling him a twat at 2am when he refused to let her in after she confessed to losing her keys. Again.
Peppa has gymnastics at 9am and George has football at 10, and it looks like it’s up to Mummy Pig to pull her finger out and get them there.
Mummy Rabbit is already waiting at the door, looking swag, while carrying the twins. Rebecca and Richard Rabbit wait patiently by her side, holding hands.
Mummy Rabbit takes her kids to the library while she waits for her eldest. Mummy Pig sits on the floor and gives George her phone, trying not to gag at the smell of all those feet.
Both kids are hungry after a busy morning. Mummy Rabbit orders her kids a healthy smoothie, and asks them to sit down and drink it quietly.
Mummy Pig is knackered. Nothing pleases her more than thinking about heading home for a snooze on the sofa while the kids watch Bing on repeat. Then Mummy Rabbit lands a shocking blow….
“See you at the teddy bears picnic later.”
“What’s she talking about?” Mummy Pig asks Peppa.
“It’s a picnic at preschool mummy, remember? We’re raising money for the new school roof. Again.”
Mummy shoves everyone into the car and ignores Mummy Rabbit walking all her children to the preschool.
They get to the picnic and everyone is sat down eating. Mummy Pig hasn’t brought a picnic. She’s got a load of old shit from the vending machines and hopes no one notices.
“Sandwich.” George shouts. Mummy Pig tries to calm George by reminding him that normally he hates sandwiches and surely he’d prefer another bag of Monster Munch.
George is now in full on meltdown mode at the prospect of not having a sandwich that he throws up his chocolate, crisp and Fruit Shoot combo all over one of Mummy Rabbit’s kids expensive lunchboxes.
This is it for Mummy Pig, who passes out in a strange mixture of shame, drunkenness and general hatred for all things kid.
Peppa starts to cry, setting off all the other kids into a high pitched wail.
It’s a good thing that Madam Gazelle is there then!
Madam Gazelle agrees to drive Mummy Pig, Peppa and George home, and sings like an angel to all the nursery rhyme tunes the kids like in the car.
Daddy Pig has just arrived home too.
He makes the mistake of mentioning how nice it was that Madam Gazelle drove them all home.
Mummy Pig picks up the nearest object and throws it at his head.